Do you remember when you first started dating your spouse… you’d talk for hours, asking questions, listening to their stories, your heart would soar as they looked into your eyes while you were talking, like you were the only person in the world…
That whole ‘getting to know you phase’ is pretty darn magical. But one of the big mistakes is that so many couples forget that asking questions, talking, and listening to each other is the best way to keep the connection alive in your relationship.
Good questions help you get to know each other but the right questions spark a great conversation, and that’s exactly what these questions are designed to do.
Sometimes it really is the little things, like a daily conversation or learning something new about each other, that really make the biggest difference in your relationship.
Why Use Romantic Questions For Couples
If you haven’t discovered yet, questions can be a powerful tool for sparking conversation and deepening intimacy in a relationship. In the early stages of a romance (that heart fluttery stage), questions can help couples get to know each other and learn about each other’s hopes, dreams, aspirations, and cute quirks.
As the relationship grows, questions can continue to play an important role by helping couples explore new topics and keep the conversation fresh.
One of the biggest complaints I hear from couples is that they are ‘bored’ in their relationship, and my go-to response is always “when was the last time you asked a new or fun question?”
Some couples like to ask each other provocative questions that push boundaries and stimulate creativity (both in and out of the bedroom); while others prefer to stick to more traditional questionnaires for couples that focus on shared values and experiences.
No matter what type of question you choose to ask, remember that the key is to keep the conversation flowing, listen to each other, and enjoy each other’s company.
By asking thoughtful questions and really listening to the answers, you can keep the spark alive in your relationship for years to come.
How To Use These Questions
You can use these questions as is, or you can use them as a starting point to create your own unique questions.
To get the most out of these questions, it’s important to be an active listener. That means really paying attention to your partner’s answers and using follow-up questions to get more information.
It can also be helpful to have a conversation about what kinds of questions you’re both comfortable answering. Some people feel shy about sharing certain things, while others might find some questions too personal.
While the idea of the questions is to create conversations and respond in as much detail as possible, it’s also important to respect your partner’s wishes and boundaries. If a topic is not up for discussion, put it aside and revisit at a later time, or talk later about why you don’t want to talk about it.
Also, keep in mind that timing is everything. You need to ask these questions at the right time, not as you’re rushing out the door or falling asleep after a big day.
With that being said, these are some ideas for ways you can use these questions:
- use them as interesting questions to ask each other on your road trip
- make your next date night a fun questions night at home (get creative and build a blanket fort or lay on a blanket outside under the stars…)
- write out the questions and put them into a ‘daily questions jar’. Draw one out each day and discuss it over dinner
Feel free to get creative, have fun, and enjoy the romantic questions and the closer connection that these questions helps you to build.
125 Romantic Questions For Couples To Ask Each Other
Below you’ll find a mixture of fun questions, intimate questions, relationship questions, deep questions, and a few random questions thrown in for good measure too.
Use this mix of questions as conversation starters, and as a great way to spark deep and meaningful conversations with each other (no more ‘did you remember the milk’ as the only conversation of your day).
If you’d prefer to ask more lighthearted questions like ‘what is your favorite movie’ or ‘what is your favorite childhood memory’ – then you might prefer these questions – 76 Questions To Ask Your Husband Other Than ‘How Was Your Day’
Remember, these romantic questions are designed to help build intimacy and open communication with each other on a deeper level, not as a way to argue or attack each other.
Be open, be honest, be kind and use these questions in positive ways.
1. What do you remember about our first kiss?
2. What would your dream date night be like?
3. How do you feel when you’re around me?
4. What are your favorite things about me?
5. Do you ever think about me when we’re not together?
6. What’s your idea of the perfect relationship?
7. What are your thoughts on marriage? What do you believe marriage means today?
8. What do you want your family to look like?
9. What’s your biggest fear in a relationship?
10. What makes you feel most loved and appreciated?
11. What do you love about me that you think I don’t know about?
12. What was the first thing you thought of when you saw me for the very first time?
13. What is a personality trait I have that you love?
14. What’s your favorite memory of us together?
15. What do you think makes our relationship special?
16. What are your hopes and dreams for our future?
17. How would you describe yourself emotionally?
18. What kind of things make you feel loved and appreciated?
19. What’s your favorite thing about being in a relationship?
20. What is an embarrassing moment you’ve had but haven’t shared with me yet?
21. What is a deal breaker in a relationship for you?
22. Do you believe your partner should be your best friend?
23. What is your favorite thing about me physically?
24. Do you have any fantasies or role-playing scenarios you’d like to try out with me?
25. What are your thoughts on physical intimacy? How often do you like to be intimate?
26. What are your favorite activities for us to do together?
27. Do you like cuddling? What’s your favorite way to be physically affectionate with me?
28. What are your thoughts on public displays of affection? Do you have any issues with being affectionate towards me in front of another person?
29. What are you most proud of about yourself?
30. What’s your idea of the perfect partner to spend the rest of your life with?
31. What’s the best relationship advice you’ve ever received?
32. What are your thoughts on communication in a relationship? Do you believe it is the most important thing in a relationship?
33. When was the last time you felt really connected to me? What were we doing?
34. What are your thoughts on compromise in a relationship?
35. What was your family like growing up? What are they like now? Is there a family member you are particularly close to?
36. How did you learn about relationships and intimacy? Was it something that was talked about openly in your family?
37. What are your thoughts on trust in a relationship? How do you feel trust is established?
38. What are your thoughts on your past relationships? What was one quality about each of them that was good?
39. How do you feel about spending time apart from me? Do you feel couples should spend time apart?
40. What is the most romantic gesture you’ve ever done for someone?
41. What is the most romantic gesture someone has ever done for you?
42. What does ‘romance’ look like for you?
43. Do you feel like you resonate with your Love Language?
44. Do you feel like you show love in different ways to how you like to receive love?
45. What are your thoughts on soulmates?
46. Do you believe that love at first sight exists?
47. Have you ever been in love before? How did you know you were in love?
48. How do you know that you’re in love with me?
49. Do you think couples can survive a long-distance relationship? Do you think we could?
50. What attracted you to me when we first met?
51. What is one special occasion you believe we should always celebrate?
52. How have you changed since we’ve been together? In what ways have you stayed the same?
53. What would the top 3 things be on your bucket list?
54. What has been the hardest thing about our relationship?
55. What are your thoughts on adventure and spontaneity in a relationship?
56. What are your thoughts on physical attractiveness and its role in a relationship?
57. What types of intimacy do you believe are essential in a relationship?
58. Do you like surprises? What’s the best surprise you’ve ever received?
59. Are you comfortable with being vulnerable with me? Why or why not?
60. What are your thoughts on emotional intimacy?
61. What are your thoughts on vulnerability? Do you believe vulnerability is needed in a relationship?
62. Are you an emotionally available person? How do you usually display your emotions?
63. What does emotional safety look like for you in a relationship?
64. What are your thoughts on trust? How do you feel it’s built and maintained in a relationship?
65. Do you have any unresolved issues from previous relationships that might impact our relationship?
66. Have you ever been heartbroken before? How did you heal and move on from it?
67. What are your thoughts on soulmates and twin flames? Do you believe in them?
68. What are your thoughts on love? What does ‘true love’ look like for you?
69. What are your thoughts on destiny and fate? Do you believe that people are meant to be together?
70. What do you think all new couples should know about each other in a romantic relationship?
71. Do you like receiving compliments from me? What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received from me?
72. How do you like being affectionate with me? What’s your favorite way to show affection?
73. When was a time when you felt really connected to me? What were we doing?
74. What is something we have in common that you love?
75. What is something different about us that you love?
76. What are some of your favorite memories of us together?
77. When was a time when you felt really seen and understood by me?
78. When was a time when you felt really loved by me?
79. What are some things you appreciate about me?
80. How important do you believe first impressions are in a relationship?
81. If you had to live the next 5 years of your life on a desert island, what would be one item you’d take, one telephone call you’d make, and one person you’d choose to have with you (besides me)?
82. Do you feel like we communicate well with each other? Why or why not?
83. When was a time when we miscommunicated with each other? How did we resolve it?
84. What are your thoughts on arguing in a relationship? Is it healthy or unhealthy?
85. When was a time when we had a disagreement? How did we handle it?
86. What are your thoughts on sacrifice in a relationship?
87. Are you willing to make sacrifices for our relationship? What would you be willing to sacrifice?
88. What are your thoughts on fighting fair in a relationship?
89. When was a time when we had an argument that wasn’t resolved? How do you feel about it now?
90. If you were to plan the perfect romantic date for me, what would it look like?
91. What is something about me that has really surprised you?
92. What is a misconception you had about me when you first met me?
93. What are some things you love about yourself?
94. What is a goal you have for yourself that you’re working on right now?
95. How can I support you in achieving your goals?
96. What is something you’re passionate about?
97. What makes you feel really fulfilled and happy?
98. Are you doing what you love? If not, what steps do you need to take to get there?
99. Do we have any shared interests or hobbies? If not, what new activities would you like to try together?
100. What is your idea of a perfect day together?
101. What are some things you would like to improve about our relationship?
102. How can I support you in improving our relationship?
103. Do you feel like we have a strong foundation for a long-term relationship? Why or why not?
104. Are there any trust issues we need to work on? If so, how can I help you feel more secure?
105. What are your thoughts on relationship counseling? Do you think it can be beneficial?
106. Do you feel like we have a good balance of time spent together and apart? If not, what changes would you like to make?
107. What are your thoughts on taking breaks from each other? When do you feel like it’s necessary to take a break?
108. What are your thoughts on jealousy in a relationship? How do you deal with jealousy?
109. Have you ever been jealous of another person in our relationship? If so, how did you handle it?
110. What are your thoughts on social media and its impact on relationships?
111. Do you think regular date nights are essential for us to stay connected? Why or why not?
112. What are your thoughts on quality time? How much quality time do you feel like you need from me?
113. What are your thoughts on physical touch and its importance in a relationship?
114. What are your thoughts on gift giving? Do you like spontaneous gifts? Do you like buying gifts for me, like flowers?
115. What words or phrases do you like to hear? Is there something I say to you that makes you feel loved or comforted?
116. What is your idea of a romantic holiday? Do you think romantic getaways are important in a relationship?
117. What is your idea of the perfect romantic gesture?
118. Do you like feeling admired by me? If so, what are some things you would like me to admire about you more?
119. When was a time when you didn’t feel loved by me? How did it make you feel?
120. What are your thoughts on saying “I love you”? Is there a certain way you like to hear it?
121. What are your thoughts on communicating about our needs in a relationship? Do you feel comfortable telling me what your needs are? Do you like it when I tell you what I need?
122. When was a time when you felt like I wasn’t meeting your needs? How did it make you feel?
123. What are your thoughts on showing appreciation for each other in a relationship?
124. What was something you loved about our first date?
125. What is something that you believe is essential in creating a healthy relationship?
BONUS: What are your thoughts on this list of questions? Did any of them spark new conversations or help you feel closer to each other?
Final Thoughts
Asking your partner these types of questions can help you to get to know them on a deeper level and create a stronger connection between you.
It’s important to remember that every relationship is different and there is no perfect formula for a successful relationship.
However, by communicating openly, being honest with each other, and showing appreciation for each other, you can create a solid foundation for a lasting and loving relationship.
While talking about a past relationship may not be your favorite subject, talking through your experiences, why you feel the way you feel, why you want or expect certain things in your relationship, and what is important in a relationship can be an incredibly powerful communication tool in your relationship.
Let us know how you went with asking these questions and how you included them in your relationship.
