We all know how important communication is in a marriage, but sometimes it’s difficult. Sometimes, the day to day tasks just take over and you find yourself more often grunting at each other as you pass in the hall rather than having a real, sit down chat. That’s okay… it’s totally normal.
We all go through these phases. But sometimes this rut can be broken by using some of these questions to ask your husband that doesn’t involve the generic ‘how was your day?’ (Or, what are the kids doing…?)
While it’s a great idea to have a whole heap of questions you can ask your husband (and he can ask you) to spark up a conversation, these tips for communication in marriage will also help:
1 – Don’t Start With The Heavy Conversations
Whenever I hear someone say that they’re having trouble communicating in their marriage, one of the first things I ask is ‘what do you try to talk about?’
More often than not, the answer is always something that a little heavy hitting. Deep emotional conversations, talks about finance or any other topic that requires a lot of thought (and sometimes stress) are types of conversations that some people naturally try to avoid.
Think of it like the foreplay of conversations. Start just chatting about things that don’t require a lot of deep thought, that are light hearted and fun. This gets the conversation flowing and allows you to move onto more in-depth topics.
2 – Speak Their Language
If you don’t already know your love language, then now is the time to check it out. You can take the quiz to find out what your love language is and it will be like a whole new world has opened up in your marriage.
Understanding how each other communicates is key to being able to communicate effectively. Sometimes you can say something until you’re blue in the face, but if you’re not speaking the same ‘language’ then they’re not going to understand.
Getting your husband to open up and talk to you can be as easy as understanding each others love language.
3 – Have Fun
Remember how much fun you used to have? What happened? Why did that stop?
Relationships are meant to be fun!! Change the scenery, be goofy together, tell each other jokes, make each other laugh…
Laughter is literally the best thing you can do when trying to communicate with each other – genuine belly laughter sets off all kinds of chemical reactions in our brain and makes us feel naturally closer to the person we are laughing with.
Some of the questions below will help you with that laughter too! Remember to use these questions to have fun! Sure, some of them are a little more emotional than others, but still, have fun with them!!
Use any of these, or all of these, to kick start conversations, have a laugh and really get that time back with your hubby.
Want to have more fun in your relationship? Grab a copy of our free Mini Relationship Planner, including the 55 questions to ask as conversation starters.
1 – Tell me something interesting about your day.
2 – What have you seen lately that made you think of me?
3 – If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be?
4 – Do you like your job at the moment? Tell me more.
5 – Would you ever want to move from where we are living?
6 – What is the funniest thing you’ve seen lately?
7 – What have you seen lately that really frustrates you?
8 – If money wasn’t an issue – what would you want to be doing right now?
9 – Where would you like to go for our next holiday?
10 – What adventure would you like to have next?
11 – What’s one thing about your parent’s relationship that you admire?
12 – How are you feeling about our financial situation at the moment?
13 – Do you want to have (more) kids?
14 – What book are you reading at the moment? What is it about?
15 – What movie do you want to go and see?
16 – Who is your favourite movie character and why?
17 – What music did you listen to in your teens? Do you still like that music now?
18 – What’s your favourite food right now?
19 – Of all the places you have been to, where is your favourite?
20 – What’s something about me that makes you smile?
21 – What’s the funniest thing you’ve heard our kids say lately?
22 – If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
23 – If you could have dinner with 3 people, dead or alive, who would they be?
24 – What would your dream date include?
25 – If you were a flavour of ice cream, what would you be?
26 – If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
27 – What was the best day of your life? Tell me all about it.
28 – If your life was made into a movie, who would play you and the other leading roles?
29 – If you were to write a book, what would it be about?
30 – What is your dream job?
31 – What dreams have you had lately?
32 – Do you think our dreams mean anything? If so, what?
33 – If I could do one thing every single day to make your life easier/happier, what would it be?
34 – If you could choose between a cook or a cleaner, which would you hire?
35 – If you could travel in time, would you go back or forward? And to when?
36 – What’s one outrageous thing you’d do for $100.
37 – If you could be any fictional character, who would you be?
38 – What song is stuck in your head at the moment?
39 – Where do you want to be in 5 years? (or 10 years)
40 – If you could choose my outfit for a day, what would you choose?
41 – If your life had a theme song, what would it be?
42 – What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?
43 – What do you consider to be your biggest achievement in life?
44 – What’s your favourite thing to do with me?
45 – What’s your favourite thing to do alone?
46 – What is causing you stress right now?
47 – What’s one thing you do when you’re feeling stressed?
48 – What do you think is my best personality trait?
49 – What do you think is your best personality trait?
50 – If we had one day left on Earth together, what would you want to do?
51 – Do you have any regrets in life?
52 – What would you tell your teenage self?
53 – If you were arrested, what would it be for?
54 – If you had to live within a TV series, which one would you choose?
55 – What’s your favourite movie of all time?
You might also love this article: 15 Questions To Ask Your Husband About Your Marriage
I honestly believe that having fun in your relationship is one of the key factors in having a successful relationship that makes you excited, makes you happy and makes you confident. Which is why I created the 100 Questions to Ask Your Spouse Workbook.
It entire purpose is to help you communicate more effectively, get to spend more time together, and to have fun doing it! You can grab your copy here –