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They say every pregnancy is different, and while I know this, I didn’t really know this until I was pregnant again. You prepare yourself for the nausea but don’t expect the fatigue, you prepare for the body changes but don’t realise they are going to come so fast and full on.
Here’s just how my second pregnancy is different to my first, some of them really took me by surprise.
1 – I Just Want To Sleep All Day
This kind of fatigue is different to anything I’ve ever experienced. I’ve worked for years as a Paramedic where we get called out at all hours of the night and need to be awake and alert within minutes, I’ve nursed a baby through sleeping for no longer than 1 hour at a time (max… for real), but nothing, absolutely nothing like this.
Where I literally couldn’t keep my head up and eyes open. I’d get out of bed, move to the lounge and fall asleep for another 6 hours, wake, eat, vomit and then sleep again. I am so grateful for an incredible husband who kept my life and our family together for weeks and weeks on end.
2 – There’s No Hiding This Bump
With my first pregnancy, I didn’t start showing until around 14 weeks. Heck I was even wearing my skinny pre-pregnancy jeans the day I went into labour. This time around my poor pants stood no hope! By week 9 I had a full on belly and I didn’t stop growing.
Even though I lost a heap of weight with hyperemesis, I still have a much, much bigger tummy this time. So much so people feel the need to ask me if I’m sure I’m not having twins. Thanks people, thanks.
3 – Everything Hurts
If things hurt during my first pregnancy, they were nothing in comparison to this time. Apparently, because everything is already ‘pre-stretched’ the body loosens up a lot easier, which results in pain in ligaments and joints. Yay! My hips feel like I’m 90 years old, breathing seems to be a lot more difficult and the migraines!! Oh the migraines are insane.
4 – I Skip Bump Photos
With pregnancy number one I took bump pics every single week. You could barely notice the difference some weeks but I didn’t care, I felt like I needed those weekly pics. For pregnancy number two, I’ve taken about five bump photos and I’m now almost 24 weeks along.
It’s not like I’m not excited about my growing belly, it’s more because I realised I’ve barely looked at those pics I took in the 4 years since I had my son. You don’t need one every week, just a few pics spread out.
5 – How Far Along Are You?
You’ll get asked this question a lot in pregnancy. For number one, you’ll respond quickly with the number of weeks (and sometimes even the number of days too). For pregnancy number two I have to actually think about it… like really think about it.
Again, it’s not because I’m not excited. It’s just this time around I also have a toddler to deal with and the weeks don’t feel like weeks as much as they just feel like a huge blur of days into days.
6 – I Barely Own Any Maternity Clothes
Even for my first pregnancy I was super conservative with maternity clothes – after all, they are so incredibly expensive and you only really wear them for a few months. Thankfully I’m pregnant over winter so baggy clothes make things a lot easier. I purchased a handful of maternity shirts, wear pants with an elastic waist and I’m all good.
7 – I’m Not Buying Everything Under The Sun
I went to a baby expo a few days ago and realised how much stuff there is to buy. Like, just stuff. I would never begrudge anyone who really wants to buy a certain item, but you definitely don’t need all of it. I had a lot of stuff for my first child that just took up space and rarely got used. Unfortunately this time I think I’ve gone in the complete opposite direction and have barely purchased anything.
8 – I’m Carrying Differently
Again, I know each pregnancy is different and my first child is a boy, this time I’m having a girl and apparently you can carry different based on gender. But wowzers. I already mentioned I’m much bigger but I also feel wider and my bump is a lot higher. It’s these subtle differences that others probably don’t notice but they make me feel like my body is soooo different now.
9 – I’m Savouring The Moments
With my first pregnancy, there was always the thought that I would do it all again. I always imagined having two or three children so pregnancy number one was the ‘trial run’ of sorts. Getting used to the whole process.
Now I’m in my second pregnancy and my husband and I have decided that this is our last. Which means I’m savouring the moments a little more. Taking more notice of ‘the last time’ and even have gone on maternity leave earlier so I can enjoy the last trimester of pregnancy more.
10 – Coffee And The Occasional Wine Aren’t Completely Off The Table.
One of the most annoying things with pregnancy is that everyone has an opinion on what you should or shouldn’t be eating, drinking and doing. No matter what you do, someone will have an issue with it. While I managed to ignore most people the first time around, that was largely due to me being so sick I would literally just eat or drink anything that would stay down.
I also cut out all caffeine (including tea), all wine and cut down hugely on sugar in my first pregnancy.
Not so much this time.
I don’t have coffee every single day and the small glass of wine is more of a once a month thing, but I allow myself these little indulgences and you know what? They feel sooooooo good. Rather than stressing out about it, I just have them in small doses and of course, discussed with my midwife.
11 – I Know What’s Coming
This is both an awesome thing, and a scary thing. With my first pregnancy, the unknown was exciting. I was never really scared of labour, but now I know so much more about it, I’ve been able to make different decisions. I’m actually really excited about labour this time!
But it doesn’t stop there. My son was a horrible sleeper, he would sleep for an hour at a time at most. Which meant I was constantly exhausted. It took months for my husband and I to figure out a routine for ourselves to manage the lack of sleep. Now we have more of an idea of how to deal if it gets super rough, which hopefully will lessen the damage (to us that is…).
Each pregnancy may be different but you never really know just how different they are going to be.